Entry Fifty-Three: Ecclesiastes 3:10-12
It is too hot now to meet at the river. As I am now the tender of the Orchards for Herod on Benjamin’s land, we decide to meet in the shady lane between two large, leafy Palm Trees. Levi and I believe that since we have struggled with our respective tragedies and have survived, we now have something to give these young men…something to offer. But we are wrong…at least in one sense. These boys have something to teach us too. Our tragedies have touched their lives as well. One knew Asher well…and his trauma is as real as ours. He tells us how he tried in vain to get Asher to follow a different path…to make better decisions. When Asher was killed in the brawl, this young man felt as if his hopes had been irreparably shattered. And the others, they have lost a good friend in Benjamin. In that we are the same: each one has been wounded deeply. But we are also alike in that we do not want to waste our suffering. If we must endure this hurt, then let it serve to make us better human beings…and, in turn, to help us make others better too.
Asher’s friend, Simeon by name, quotes a Roman philosopher named Lucius Annaeus Seneca. “Every new beginning comes from some other beginning’s end.” So the Gentile’s have wisdom too, I say. We all laugh. Another young man, John by name, quotes from the preacher. “God has set eternity in the hearts of human beings, and yet they cannot grasp what God has done from beginning to end.” We talk about many things…and enjoy learning from each other. Ah, Benjamin. While you changed my life in profound ways by your presence, you have also changed me profoundly by your absence. Had you not left this aching void in my heart, my life would never have been filled by these wonderful people.
I no longer have to seek you in my dreams and in my fantasies. You live on in our growing care for each other.
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