I am no expert on grief…I would most certainly not consider myself a grief counsellor. I am a mere participant in this process we call life…I am in the thick and the thin of it all along with the rest of humanity. We are conceived, we are born, we live as best we can, and we die…common denominators between us all. Hopefully, we learn something about the purpose of these events as we move from one end of the spectrum to the other.
If I have learned anything, it is that life involves suffering…gains become losses…joy ultimately gives way to sorrow. Even the shiniest objects are eventually subject to rust and decay. We all – every human being on this planet – must reach the point where we realise that ‘naked we came from the womb, naked we shall return’. There is nothing here that is eternally removable…nothing we can take with us once we discard the physical entity, we call a body. Ashes to ashes, dust to dust…we brought nothing in, we will take nothing out.
In the beginning, the Creator God gave us a perfect world. We screwed it up…we doubted His goodness and wanted more. I ask myself: is that not the universal root of suffering? We somehow believe He has short-changed us…withheld something we desire. And as Adam pointed a finger to his wife and his wife to the snake, so we project out own reluctance to live according to the Creator’s perfect plan onto another…a person or a circumstance…and so we seek to absolve ourselves from all blame. But I believe this attempt at absolution simply adds to our suffering. Rather than relinquish our desire for more, why not submit to a reality of contentment? A life of dependence and trust…this way, suffering becomes a tool in the hand of one who wishes to heal us of our own faults.
Eldon’s life was certainly filled with suffering. From his earliest days, life appeared to deal him a bad deck…with some cards he played well, with others he folded. He was blessed with many talents…an exceptional intellect and ability and creativity. But I believe it will be his kindness that will live on the longest in the hearts and minds of those who knew him. It will be his gentle spirit that will keep him in the present. In the scheme of things, it is the quality of character that endures…not material things…not achievements…but the attractiveness of the person as a person.
Eldon will live on because of his rare qualities. His legacy is made up with the stuff of memories and moments…not things that are subject to rust or decay. He lives on as one who learned to keep an open hand as, one by one, every dream, every hope, every ambition, was taken from him. He leaves behind no bitterness or resentment or discontent…and so we will remember him as we continue to travel on our own respective journeys.
The object of life is not accumulation of material or even non-material things…the object of life is submission...the object of life is a confession that God has not withheld His best from us…that we need not desire more than He gives…that all we desire is Him. The goal of this process we call life, is Him. He is the only non-transitory element in our lives. Death ultimately strips us of all we pile onto our existence…and without Him, we enter into eternity with nothing.
And so from death we learn the lesson of life. This earthly period is a training ground…a battle ground…a surgery…a temporary that leads to an eternal. In this, Eldon once more instructs us. Suffering…loss, grief, even despair…each has its purpose. The removal of what we hold dear points us to the goal and purpose of our journey. We are not owners here…we are sojourners…travellers…and the sooner we learn to travel lightly, the happier we will be.
Eldon has ended his journey…he has walked through the door of the momentary and entered into the great always.
Rest eternal grant unto him, O Lord…may your gracious and perpetual light shine on him.
No comments:
Post a Comment