Day Thirteen:
I woke with a start. For a moment I did not know where I was. I looked around me. It was dark and I could barely make out the shapes surrounding me.
I had been dreaming. In my dream I was standing on the bank of the River Jordan…at a spot Benjamin loved to visit frequently as a child. There is a bend in the river and the flow of the water has created a small pool to the one side where you can safely bathe, even when the river is high. Above the pool, a rock overhang partially shields you from the sun…and from the view of travellers on the road. There is a soft, grassy beach where you may sit until your body is dry.
I was there…we were there…Benjamin and me. His high pitched, delightful squealing echoes on in my mind. It sounds as if it is bouncing off the stone walls of the room. I am there no longer. But it was so real…I could see the light glittering on the drops of water on his skin…I could touch the rock, feel the stones under my bare feet…I could smell the freshness of the wet grass. For a while unreality became reality. If I had reached out, I would have touched him.
But I looked away for a brief moment. When I looked back, Benjamin was gone. Nothing looked the same…the water looked ominous…the rocks sharp and cold…the grass dry and brittle…the sky dark and foreboding. “Benjamin!” I cried out. My voice dragged me up to the surface of consciousness…into the darkness of my current existence.
There is a light…an oil lamp appears in the crack of the door. “Master.” It is the voice of Elizabeth. She wipes my sweating forehead and ushers me gently back to sleep with a lullaby.
Today I ate whatever she gave me. I must regain my strength. I need to go to the pool. Soon.
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